Secret Snog
by Demonsblade
Summary: [Complete] James and Sirius decide to set up a game of Secret Snog for Valentine's Day, and convince Remus into joining. Rule: You must snog the person whose name you pick out of the hat. Who'll get to snog our two favorite canines? SBRL slashiness
1. The Rules of the Game

** Secret Snog**

I don't know what possessed me to write this. I suddenly found inspiration one day when thinking about a Secret Santa game I played in seventh grade. It's a bit late for Valentine's Day, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

"I've got the _perfect_ Valentine's Day activity!"

"No, James."

"Aw, come on, Remus! It'll be fun."

"No."

"Please?"

Remus glared at his friend over his heavy Transfiguration book. He was curled up in a squashy armchair by the fire, finishing his reading assignment. James perched on the armrest, poking Remus until the boy snapped the book shut and scowled at him.

"Please?" he repeated.

Remus let out a long-suffering sigh. "What's this activity you've got planned?"

"Sirius and I came up with it. Speaking of which—Oy, Sirius!" James called. Sirius was conversing with a small brunette girl in the middle of the Common Room—or rather, the girl was chatting away and Sirius was pretending to listen with a glazed look in his eyes that told Remus he hadn't heard a word of what she had said.

Looking relieved to have an excuse to get away, Sirius politely broke off the conversation and came to join the two boys by the fire.

"Thanks, James," said Sirius. "I didn't think she'd ever shut up."

"Any time. Remus here wants to know what we have planned for Valentine's Day."

Sirius's eyes lit up and he sat on Remus's other armrest. "Secret Snog."

"Secret Snog," Remus repeated dryly. "Do I even want to know?"

"Of course you do. It's a bit like Secret Santa, but instead of giving presents, you give a kiss."

"You see, Moony, everyone who wants to play writes their name on a slip of parchment and puts it in a hat. Then we mix up the names and each person picks out a name. They have to snog the person whose name they picked before the day is over."

"And if they don't?" asked Remus, dreading the answer.

"If they don't…well, let's just say there will be consequences."

"Like what?"

"Like breaking out in enormous purple pimples that last for three months."

"Of course," added James, "we won't actually tell anyone that until after they've picked the names."

"Oh, of course."

"So are you going to play, Remus? I'll make the announcement tonight, so that everyone will have enough time to put their names in. Valentine's Day is tomorrow."

"You actually think anyone will be stupid enough to play?" asked Remus. "Wait—don't answer that. I can think of several people already."

"So you're going to play, right?"

"No."

"It's just the Griffindors, fourth year and above. You don't have to worry about having to snog a Slytherin or a first year."

"No."

"Please?"

"NO!"

"Hey, James," said Sirius. "Why don't you go make the announcement? And try to convince Evans to join? I'll work on Moony."

"Sure, mate." James winked at Sirius knowingly before striding with confidence into the middle of the room and jumping up on a table to call for silence.

Sirius slid into the armchair beside Remus—which, being a one-person seat, meant that both boys were now squashed together and much too close for Remus's comfort.

"It'll be fun, Moony."

"I don't think it's a good idea, Padfoot." Remus tried to keep his voice as neutral as possible, doing his best to ignore the tingling sensations in his body from Sirius's warmth beside him.

"What are you worried about?"

"Nothing. I just don't feel like snogging random people I don't even know."

"But what if it's someone you _do_ know?"

"Then that'll be even weirder. What if I get the name of one of my friends…or worse, one of my friends' crushes? Like Lily Evans? James'll kill me."

"You don't have to tell him. Besides, what if you get the name of _your_ crush?"

"I don't have a crush, Sirius."

"Or so you claim."

"You don't believe me?"

"I don't know, Remus. You've been a little too happy lately."

Remus coughed nervously, turning away so that Sirius couldn't see the blush on his cheeks.

_If only you knew_, Remus thought.

"If you're worried about kissing, Moony, you can practice on me."

It took a few seconds for the full impact of Sirius's words to hit him. "Wh—what? I—you—no—I'm not worried."

"You sure?"

Sirius bent toward him, smirking; close enough so that Remus could feel his breath. The spicy scent of his friend filled his nostrils, the aroma making Remus slightly dizzy.

He felt the blood rush to his face and leaned back.

Sirius advanced. Their noses were almost touching.

Remus's breath caught in his throat. He was sure Sirius could hear his pounding heart. He wanted to look away from those pale eyes—but couldn't. There was something—_alluring—_about the emotions that swam just out of reach in those blue pools.

"This—isn't—normal, Sirius," he managed to blurt out.

Sirius's smile faltered for a minute, but returned as he sat upright, putting a comfortable distance between the two of them.

"I'll…do it." Remus was surprised to hear those words come out of his mouth.

"You'll what? Practice on me?"

"No, I'll do the stupid Secret Snog."

Sirius beamed, clapping Remus so hard on the shoulder that the boy cried out in pain.

"Sorry, mate."

"Don't worry about it," said Remus, sullenly rubbing the spot where Sirius had smacked him.

"Great! Then let's go put your name in that hat." Sirius stood and lifted Remus onto his feet.

"What about you?"

"My name's already in the hat."

"Oh."

Remus felt a little flutter of hope. Maybe he'd get Sirius's name. He let his mind follow in that strain for a while.

The daydream ended with Sirius and Remus confessing their feelings for each other and kissing—among other things. Remus sighed. _Like that'll ever happen. Sirius is the Casanova of Hogwarts…and I'm a gay werewolf with no experience in love. Oh, yeah. That'll work out well._

To Remus's surprise, nearly everyone above third year in Griffindor House signed up for Secret Snog. When the Marauders made their way to up the staircase to their dormitory, the old top hat James had used for the names was almost full to the brim with pieces of pink and blue parchments. James had decided to use only one hat, but write the girls' names on pick parchment and the boys' names on blue. That way, one could choose according to whatever gender one was attracted to.

Remus wondered if he dared to pick a blue parchment. He quickly decided he didn't dare. At least, not if he had to pick in front of everyone.

x-x-x-x-x

Valentine's Day dawned bright and early with no clouds to be seen in the sky. The Hogwarts grounds were blanketed with snow, but the Griffindor Common Room was warm and cozy.

Sirius watched as James gathered up the participants of Secret Snog to pick names.

"Everyone shall pick _one_ name. Girls are pink. Boys are blue. So pick whatever gender you like." James stopped to wink before continuing. "No one else will be able to read your parchment, so you don't have to worry about any prying eyes. You must snog—and I mean on the lips, at least a minute, saliva must be involved—the person whose name you pick out of this hat before midnight…or else."

"Or else?" asked a nervous-looking fifth year in front of the crowd.

"Or else you'll see." James smiled cryptically. "And to demonstrate, I shall go first!" He held the hat in front of him, closed his eyes, dug into the pile, and pulled out a pink slip of parchment. "Right, see?" James scanned the name—and froze. He paled, then turned red as a rapturous smile broke on his lips. "Uh…yes. It's easy, see? Sirius, would you do the honors?"

Sirius made his way to the hat the flustered James held out for him. He put on his most winning smile—the one that made girls swoon over him—and shoved his hand into the hat. "Why do you look so happy, James?" he whispered out of the corner of his mouth. "Did you get Evans?"

From the way James sputtered and looked away, he had.

Sirius pulled out a slip of parchment—blue—and ignored the gasps and cries of his scandalized admirers. Everyone in Griffindor suspected that he swung both ways, but what they didn't know was that he actually only swung toward his own sex (more or less). This was the first time he had "come out" in public like this.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and traced it up to James's smiling face. "I'm proud of you, mate," James said, his eyes sparkling with approval.

Sirius grinned back. James was the only one he had told about his orientation before this.

He took a deep breath and opened the parchment.

_Remus Lupin. Sixth year._

Sirius closed his eyes and opened them again. The name hadn't changed. It took all of his self-control to keep from jumping up and screaming his joy at the top of his lungs. Instead, he made his way dazedly to an armchair in the corner of the room and sunk down in it.

_Remus…oh, God! How the hell am I going to kiss Remus? Will he realize that I like him? Remus isn't even gay!_

Sirius had liked Remus since their second year, but had never followed up on his feelings for fear of losing his friendship. This was the perfect opportunity to test Remus's feelings. But Sirius had the premonition that this was going to be hard—perhaps the hardest thing he'd ever attempted besides the Animagus transformation.

TBC…

* * *

I hope you enjoyed the story so far. I like the next chapter (which is half-way done), so I hope you guys come back to read more. Any and all reviews will be appreciated. Any suggestions welcome, as well. 


	2. Blue Slips and Slip Ups

**Secret Snog **

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple. 

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

Remus couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Sirius pick a blue parchment from the hat. He thought he must be hallucinating. 

_Sirius Black, the Hogwarts heartthrob, is _GAY

He felt dazed by the enormity of the revelation—and a little put out that his friend hadn't told him before. But then again, Remus hadn't told anyone either. Maybe it was easier for Sirius to tell strangers before he told his friends.

As Remus watched Sirius waver to a chair in the corner, his heart filled with hope once again. Maybe he had a chance…if he picked a blue parchment.

_Come on, Remus! You can do this._

Before he could lose his courage, Remus pushed his way urgently to where James was standing with the top hat.

James raised an eyebrow as Remus politely shoved a fourth year girl out of the way to get in front of the line.

"Sorry, James," he apologized quickly. "I have to do this before I lose my nerve."

James simply nodded and held out the hat. Remus inhaled deeply and plunged in, searching for a blue slip. When he finally pulled one out, he heard the surprised gasps and gapes of the students who had gathered around to watch. James was looking from Remus to the parchment with wide eyes.

Remus smiled apologetically. "I know I didn't tell you…but…"

"Don't worry about it." James smiled reassuringly. "I'm bloody proud of you."

"Thanks, James. It means a lot to me."

The open-mouthed, gawking crowd parted as Remus turned to leave. The whispers followed him like a swarm of angry bees. Come dinnertime, Remus was sure the entire school would know about his preferences. He sighed and made his way over to where Sirius was sitting by the window, blithely oblivious to the limelight Remus had attracted. Just before he reached the armchair in which his friend was seated, Remus stopped to open the parchment with trembling hands.

_Fabian Prewett. Fourth Year._

Remus didn't realize he had been holding his breath until he felt it leave him in a low hiss. He felt thoroughly deflated. He hadn't gotten Sirius's name. And what was worse—now he had to snog Prewett or face three months with purple pimples.

"Hey, Padfoot," he said somewhat dejectedly as he flopped into an armchair facing his friend.

Sirius looked up, startled. "Oh—hi, Remus. Did you pick a name?"

Remus held up the parchment and saw Sirius' face change—from surprise to shock to disbelief—and then, to joy.

"You—you're—I never thought—I thought you were—_You're gay_?"

"Are you?"

Sirius grinned sheepishly and held up his blue parchment.

"Then so am I," said Remus, lowering himself into the chair opposite the boy. That was when something in his mind clicked—something that had been nagging him for a long time. "How long have you known? I mean—is this why you were never serious about any of your relationships so far?"

Sirius sighed. Remus thought vaguely how strange it was to see such a solemn expression on his face. "I've known for about…since fourth year, I guess. Looking back, I can't believe I didn't realize it sooner. There were so many clues."

Remus nodded. That was something he was trying to come to grips with, as well. Everything looked so clear in retrospect.

"And for a while I thought that if I just kept dating girls, I'd—I don't know"—Sirius's voice dropped to an ashamed whisper—"_cure_ myself."

"It's not a disease, Sirius."

"I know that now…I was just so scared back then. I didn't know anyone who was like me."

"You knew me," Remus pointed out.

"Yeah, but I didn't know you were—you know. Did _you_ even know?"

"I've known since third year. It must have been easier for me to admit it to myself. This was just one more thing that made me an outcast."

Remus felt a hand on his cheek and looked up into Sirius's pale blue eyes and set expression.

"You're not an outcast, Rem. You're a Marauder. And that places you at the top of the heap. Stop doubting yourself." Sirius lowered his voice, checking around for any unwelcome eavesdroppers. "Your lycanthropy shouldn't get in the way of your life. Neither should your homosexuality."

That was Sirius. _Always the optimist._

"Thanks, Sirius," Remus said instead, offering the boy a smile of gratitude.

"No problem." Sirius leaned back in his chair. "So, whose name did you get?"

"You tell me yours first."

"Point taken. We'll tell each other after the snog, okay?"

"Uh…Sirius? What if the person I got isn't gay?"

"That's something dear Prongsy forgot to think of. But still, it's just a kiss, Rem."

"To you, maybe," Remus snapped. "I'm not used to having a different snogging partner every week,"

"Hey! I haven't dated anyone for nearly a year and a half now."

"Okay, okay. Sorry."

"It doesn't matter. Don't apologize," Sirius said quickly. He raised an eyebrow smugly. "I don't know why everyone seems to think I'm promiscuous. Just because I'm _devastatingly _handsome—" Sirius was cut off by a pillow hitting him squarely in the face.

x-x-x-x-x

Sirius's mind reeled as he made his way to the Great Hall for lunch. Remus liked men…Remus liked men…Remus—Merlin! He liked men! But—did that mean Remus thought of Sirius as more than a friend? Just because he liked men didn't mean he liked _all_ men. _And we've been friends since first year…_

By the time Sirius settled himself at the long Griffindor table, he had lost his appetite. A cold lump of doubt had permanently taken up residence in his stomach, displacing the butterflies of hope that had previously fluttered there. He ended up not eating more than a few bites and was officially an emotional wreck when he stumbled through the portrait hole of the Griffindor Common Room. He was even beginning to think that three months of purple pimples wouldn't be so bad.

Sirius's thoughts were so focused on Remus that he didn't notice when a sixth year girl made a beeline for him as soon as he clambered through the entrance.

Before he knew what was happening, the pretty blonde had cornered him and accosted his lips.

x-x-x-x-x

Remus climbed carefully through the portrait hole after James and Peter. They had all been laughing at a joke James had made, but the scene that met them made them stop dead in their tracks, all laughter forgotten.

Sirius was pressed up against the wall, cramming his tongue down a sixth year girl's throat. Remus could hardly breathe. He stood frozen in place by his leaden legs, gaping; he didn't notice James and Peter's anxious glances in his direction.

Something rose inside him—something raw, wild. Remus didn't know why he felt as if the bottom had dropped out of his stomach. He didn't know why he suddenly found himself striding in Fabian Prewett's direction, or why he pulled the boy up by the collar and jerked him forwards. Remus vaguely registered the shocked look on Fabian's face before their mouths met.

The kiss was clumsy, with Remus doing most of the work. Fabian was so stunned that he was mostly unresponsive at first. But then the boy—for some reason—leaned into the kiss and wound his hands tentatively around Remus's waist, pulling him closer.

Remus's mind was nonexistent; he ran his tongue along Fabian's lips, which parted and let him enter. It wasn't the taste he wanted, needed, _craved_. The mouth pressed into his own didn't taste like Sirius, but Remus's unrelenting frenzy kept him going, like a furious conflagration raging inside him.

When Remus finally wrenched himself off the boy, he felt shaky, winded—and more than just a little nauseous. Fabian was staring at him with wide eyes, chest heaving.

All the logic that had so far deserted him sped back with a force that nearly knocked him flat.

"I—I—I didn't mean—I'm so sorry," Remus stammered, feeling the blood race to his cheeks in mortification. Everyone in the room was staring at them. The silence was unnerving.

_I'm dead…Please just let me die now._

"No, it's okay. I had a feeling something like this was going to happen when I signed up for this game." Fabian smirked. "That was some kiss."

Remus flushed and looked away.

"Don't fret, Remus. I'm not going to freak out and avoid you for the rest of my life. If you like boys—that's okay with me. Besides, I'd rather kiss you than, say, Betsy Carmonger any day. At least _you _don't smell like old socks." Fabian made a face.

Remus felt a rush of gratitude toward the boy and managed to smile through his embarrassment. "Thanks, Prewett."

"Oh, surely after a kiss like that we can use first names, Remus?"

"Sure, Fabian. Thanks."

Remus's mind was spinning in a whirl of dumbfounded bewilderment. He made his way back to where James and Peter were ogling him with obvious astonishment etched in their faces. He grinned awkwardly, not meeting their eyes.

"Remus…"

The sound of Sirius's trembling voice made Remus whip around to face his friend. Sirius was standing less than two feet away from him, gawking openly.

Remus suddenly felt sick to his stomach. "Sirius, I…"

Sirius shook his head, silencing him. He smiled—or rather, tried to smile and ended up grimacing—his eyes so full of pain that Remus thought his heart had stopped.

"I—I never knew you had it in you, Rem." The false cheer in Sirius's voice made Remus wince. "That was—very—er—aggressive."

_Time to escape!_ screamed a voice in Remus's mind.

"Right…erm…I have to finish Charms homework. Later." And with that, Remus left his friends standing there, gaping after him as he ascended the staircase to their dormitory.

All the while, Remus silently vowed to make James pay for inventing such a stupid, screwed up game. He was lucky that Fabian had reacted the way he did. Otherwise, Remus didn't know what he would have done. _Probably died from embarrassment is what I would have done. James, you'll be worse than dead when I'm through with you._

TBC…

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: I saw this method of closing chapters on the story "Secrets of the Forbidden Bloomcloset" by Anthea Rose. I hope you don't mind if I steal an idea. 

SIRIUS: Isn't that illegal?

DEMONSBLADE: Shut it, you.

SIRIUS: You _dare_ tell the great and most noble Sirius Black to—

DEMONSBLADE: Anyway, thanks for all those reviews. I've never gotten so many reviews for a single chapter.

SIRIUS: Hey, look. I think you may have gotten a flame—"This is an okay story, but extremely gross."

DEMONSBLADE: Uh…does that qualify as a flame? I've never been flamed before.

SIRIUS: How does it feel, you little pervert?

DEMONSBLADE: It feels pretty good!

SIRIUS: Good? _Good? _

DEMONSBLADE: Maybe I have thick skin…

SIRIUS: Or a thick skull.

DEMONSBLADE: Don't disrespect the author. I can make you do things—_terrible_ things.

SIRIUS: Like what, oh magnificent author?

DEMONSBLADE: Like extending Secret Snog to include all of Hogwarts and having you get Snivelly's name.

SIRIUS: Evil. EVIL!

DEMONSBLADE: Anyways, thanks so much for all the reviews, everyone. And don't be put off by Remus's kiss with Fabian, okay?

SIRIUS: Put off? I'm furious! How dare you make MY Remus kiss that—that—_toad_? That stupid do-good prick.

DEMONSBLADE: Hey! He's really nice.

SIRIUS: Oh, yes. How I'd like to stick his wand up his own—

DEMONSBLADE: Okay! As I was saying…There'll be some Siri/Remmy action soon, I promise.

SIRIUS: Does it involve a bathtub and lots of chocolate sauce?

DEMONSBLADE: We'll see. Oh, and don't forget that James has his snog, too. Peter seems to be completely absent from this story…but maybe it's for the better.

SIRIUS: That traitor doesn't deserve to be in the same _country_ as Rem and me. Much less the same story.

DEMONSBLADE: Right…I realize some of you are confused by the rules of the game. I shall try to explain.

SIRIUS: _I'll_ explain, if you don't mind. _I'm_ the one that thought it up.

DEMONSBLADE: Explain away.

SIRIUS: Everyone writes their name on a slip of paper/parchment (pink for girls, blue for boys) and puts it in a hat. Then everyone picks a name out from said hat (a pink slip if you like girls, blue if you like boys). You must snog the person whose name you pick before the day is over, or else you break out in purple pimples for three months.

DEMONSBLADE: So basically, everyone ends up snogging two different people—the one whose name you pick and the one who picks your name. I hope that eliminates any confusion. Please keep the reviews coming. The reason I posted a chapter so fast is because I received so many reviews that it put me on hyperdrive. So please review!

SIRIUS: Yeah, review and tell this stupid—I mean, wonderful author—please put the club down—that she must let me and Moony—

DEMONSBLADE: Moony and I.

SIRIUS: Moony _and I_ romp and ravish each other's rumps—hey, what is that gag for?

DEMONSBLADE: Hehe. That's all for now. 'Till next time, peeps!

SIRIUS: Mmfngh!


	3. What Friends Do

** Secret Snog**

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

Remus managed to make it up the stairs and inside the dormitory without any mishaps. But no sooner had he closed the door behind him that his body lost the battle of dominance to his emotions. His flesh froze icy and numb and he trembled uncontrollably. Remus walked unsteadily to the closest bed—he didn't care whose—and collapsed into the welcoming sheets, covering himself with the blanket in a feeble attempt to stop the shivers wracking his body.

His heart was thudding in his throat, and his stomach felt like he had swallowed a bucket of worms. He felt filthy and weak. The realization that he had gambled his life at Hogwarts and the acceptance of his peers for an unrequited attraction toward his best friend—gambled and lost—chilled him to the marrow.

_And Fabian…_

If there was ever a chance that his feelings toward Sirius might have been even a little less than unreturned, he had completely and successfully ruined it.

Remus couldn't stop the hot tears that leaked from his eyes, and he made no pretense to try. Pulling the blanket over his head, he wept into the soft fabric, doing his best to stifle the sound of his wrangled sobs.

x-x-x-x-x

Remus hadn't realized he had dozed off until he was shaken awake by a rough but comforting hand.

He blinked sleepily, wincing at the pain in his swollen eyes. "James?"

The image of his best friend smiled down on him, and Remus sat up slowly, putting a hand to his throbbing head.

"May I?" asked James, gesturing toward the bed.

"Oh, uh…sure." Remus scooted to make room for James, who sank down cross-legged onto the bed beside him, looking concerned.

"Is everything all right, Remus?" James began. "You've been a bit off color lately. And, well…considering what happened today…" he trailed off, looking away apologetically.

"It's—nothing."

"You're not as great a liar as you'd like to think, Remus. Though I must admit, you're better than Sirius. It's quite pathetic, really, for a Marauder to not be able to lie effectively."

Remus grinned reluctantly. "Okay, you got me. I've been worried about…about…"

"About?" James prompted, showing infinitely more patience than Remus would have dreamed possible from him.

"About…you know…being attracted to men. I hated keeping it to myself. It's like the secret was gnawing at me from the inside, tearing me up. I wanted so badly to tell you, Sirius, Peter, _anyone_." Remus ended in a whisper. As much as he had told Sirius he had come to accept his sexuality, he was scared to death of the reactions he expected.

"But you thought we'd reject you?" James patted Remus's shoulder reassuringly. "We accepted the fact that you turn into a werewolf, so why wouldn't we accept the fact that you like blokes?" He beamed, eliciting a weak smile from Remus.

"Thanks, James."

"That's not it, though, is it?" James took a deep breath, as if preparing himself for the worst. "What was the thing you pulled with Prewett?"

Remus couldn't help it. He flinched, and James pulled back his hand, though his worried expression never wavered.

"I don't know, James. I just—I don't know _what_ I was thinking. I wasn't thinking at all. Something just—took over. And before I knew it, I was trying to choke Fabian with my tongue. I—when I saw Sirius, I just—" Remus suddenly clapped a hand to his mouth, realizing what he had just said.

"Sirius? I had a hunch this had something to do with dear old Padfoot.—What, Moony? You think I wouldn't notice? Honestly, you two are completely obvious…and impossibly dense for the brightest students in our year."

"That's you, James. Not me."

"Remus," said James, fixing him with a piercing look. "Don't underestimate yourself. You _are_ one of the smartest students at Hogwarts. And don't you forget it. Besides, you're changing the subject. As I was saying, you and Padfoot are obvious. I mean, how could anyone miss the way you two grab nearly any and _every_ chance to touch each other."

"What?" Remus asked, startled. He knew _he_ certainly did just what James had claimed, but _Sirius_? Impossible. "Sirius doesn't—I know he's gay, but he doesn't fancy me, if that's what you're suggesting, James."

"Why not?"

Remus lifted a sardonic eyebrow at his friend.

"Come on, Remus. Why wouldn't he like you? I mean, you're smart, you're funny, you're a Marauder, you're—"

"—A coward, a werewolf—"

"—The kindest person I've ever met," James plowed on, pretending he hadn't heard the comment. "You're talented and handsome to boot."

Remus snorted derisively, earning a sharp glare from James.

"You _are_, Remus. You're very handsome."

"Oh, really? Says who?"

"Says me. And"—James gritted his teeth a little—"Lily. And a lot of other girls, in fact. And Sirius. And Prewett, if his reaction to your little kiss was any indicator. You have quite a little fanclub, actually. If you just open your eyes a little, you'd see that you're just as popular among the girls as Sirius or me. And probably among the closeted guys, as well. At least you will be once the word gets out about where your preferences lie."

"Hey, wait a minute! As much as I appreciate your words of comfort, it's your bloody fault that this whole thing blew up in my face."

"What?" James asked with an expression of mock-surprise, his mouth twitching.

"Yes, you pompous git," growled Remus, though his anger had quite dissipated by this time. "It was your stupid game that caused all this."

"But wasn't that a _perfect_ excuse to come out?"

"I suppose so…I do feel better now that it's out in the open. I can deal with keeping my lycanthropy a secret. I mean, I only have to face it once a month. But this—this is so much a part of who I am that it was hurting me not to let it out."

"See? Every line has a silver trim."

"I think it's 'every cloud has a silver lining.'"

"Whatever. Stupid Muggle proverbs."

Remus chuckled.

"By the way, Sirius wants to talk to you, Rem."

"Wha—what?" Remus asked, his voice strangling on his sudden panic.

"Sirius. He wants to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Beats me. He wanted to be the one to wake you, but I had a hunch his presence wouldn't have quite achieved the goal of comforting you. Are you ready to talk to him?"

Remus shook his head, his heart sinking into his stomach. He didn't think he could face Sirius after what he had done—after how Sirius had reacted.

James slid off the bed and bent down so that he was at Remus's eye level. "He's waiting outside the door. Should I tell him to come back later?"

"N—no. I'll talk to him."

"Good. And…uh…"—James shuffled his feet uncomfortably—"I was wondering if—if—a hug would make you feel better."

"A hug?" Remus asked blankly. James nodded, his cheeks reddening a little. Remus couldn't help the laugh that forced its way through his lips. The sight of his friend—the aloof and arrogant James Potter—offering a hug and blushing like a five year old made him want to roll around the floor in mirth.

"Sure, James," he said when he regained control of himself. "A hug would be—nice."

James grinned and kneeled on the bed, awkwardly wrapping his arms around Remus's shoulders. The embrace, which Remus gratefully returned, was rather forceful but comforting. Remus smiled as they pulled apart.

"Thanks, James. I really needed that."

"Don't mention it, Moony."

"I'm just surprised you don't feel uncomfortable touching me."

"Why would I feel uncomfortable?" James stared at him perplexedly before his eyes widened in comprehension. "Oh! But I told you. Your being gay doesn't bother me in the least. Sirius told me a while ago, and I haven't acted any differently around him."

"You knew about Sirius?"

"Yep. Stupid prick's too bloody conceited to keep it to himself. Don't worry, Remus. There's a reason why he didn't tell you, and once you hear it, I'm sure you'll understand. But I'll let him give you that reason himself."

James leaned over the bed and swept Remus into another quick embrace before walking over to the door and pulling it open.

TBC…

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: Aww, James! You're such a good friend.

JAMES: Why, thank you.

SIRIUS: But poor, poor Moony. He's suffering and I can't suck his problems away.

JAMES: Eww. I know I said I support you guys, Sirius, but I really don't need to hear of your little sexual exploits.

SIRIUS: Get your head out of the gutter. I'm just saying that Moony's troubled and I wish I could help. And besides, you know you get off just thinking about us together.

JAMES: You wish, you arrogant berk.

DEMONSBLADE: As I was saying, it's time to answer some reviews.

JAMES: Here's one from **gil de hu**, who wants to know how many chapters this story is going to be.

DEMONSBLADE: You know, I'm not quite sure. This story was originally meant to be a one-shot, but somehow got dragged out to this. So…no less than four chapters, no more than ten. And I promise to all of you that I'll make it up to you for having Remus do what he did to Fabian. Lots of Siri/Rem slashy fluff will come before the end.

SIRIUS: Yay! You know, you should consider making this a smut fic.

DEMONSBLADE: Hmmm…that's actually not a bad idea. I'd like to keep the rating at T (PG13), though. I don't think I'm ready to write an M (R) fic.

SIRIUS: **gods sent angel** wrote that she'd like to see some bum ravishing. See, you stupid git of an author? I told you.

DEMONSBLADE: Hey! I never said there wasn't going to be any bum ravishing. You just have to wait for it.

JAMES: Oooookay. Moving on…

DEMONSBLADE: The review from **woelfin-akhuna** made me very happy. Thanks!

JAMES: There have been a lot of threats to cry if you don't update soon.

DEMONSBLADE: It was truly evil of me to stop after that last chapter, so I'm doing you guys a favor and updating early. Usually I update only once a week, but I've decided to be a bit faster on this story since I've been getting a lot of positive feedback.

JAMES: You should thank me, you know. Everyone is taken with the game because, naturally, it's brilliant.

SIRIUS: So bow before the superior intelligence that is Sirius Black and James Potter.

JAMES: That's right, you fools!

DEMONSBLADE: Oh, dear. I'm surprised your heads haven't exploded from all the arrogance.

SIRIUS: I resent that!

DEMONSBLADE: Well, thanks for the reviews and keep 'em coming! Next chapter will follow very very soon. I know this chapter was a little boring.

JAMES: Hey!

SIRIUS: Sorry, James. But everyone wants to see me, not you.

DEMONSBLADE: I promise the next chapter will be very fluffy and angsty and exciting.

SIRIUS: Do you actually plan to hold to that promise or is this just another way of attracting more reviewers?

DEMONSBLADE: Heh…later, gaters!


	4. I Don't Mind

** Secret Snog**

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple. **This chapter is a bit on the M (R) side, so be warned.**

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

Sirius pressed his ear to the door, straining to hear the conversation taking place in the dormitory. He cursed the thick wood that muffled the words floating from the room beyond, making the sentences barely distinguishable from the laughs and grunts. 

"…waiting outside the door…" said a voice that Sirius recognized immediately as James's.

"…uncomfortable touching me…" said Remus.

Sirius only caught snatches of sentences and long lapses of silence.

Before he had time to react, the door he was leaning on pulled away, and Sirius stumbled clumsily into the room. Somewhere along the way he lost his balance and the wood floor rushed up to meet him.

He pushed himself up, rubbing ruefully at the spot where his head had connected with the ground. The first thing he saw was a pair of brown shoes, followed closely by the mocking face of their owner.

"Sirius," James admonished with a stern glare. "Were you trying to eavesdrop? Because Moony here has just agreed to talk to you and I wouldn't be making him mad, if I were you." James's face slowly broke out in a smile and he winked down at Sirius, holding out a hand to help him up.

James hauled him up and exited quickly, whispering a quiet but distinct "Good luck" on the way.

"Sirius?" called Remus's trembling voice. Sirius traced it to his own bed, the closest to the door. The curtains were pulled around the head and foot of the bed, obscuring it from view.

Sirius cautiously walked around to face his friend. His heart nearly broke again at the wretched condition of the boy.

Remus's eyes were red and swollen and rimmed with dusky blue rings. The dried out rivulets cut by tears were all-too-obvious in the afternoon sunlight rolling in waves through the window.

"Moony," said Sirius, his voice suddenly hoarse and hesitant. Remus was carefully avoiding his eyes, and a faint blush had crept onto his cheeks.

"Sirius, you…uh…wanted to talk to me?"

"Huh?" Sirius mentally shook himself; he had been distracted by the curious way in which the light filtered through Remus's hair, making him look as if he had a golden halo perched above his head.

"James said you wanted to talk to me," repeated Remus, cocking his head inquisitively.

Sirius could feel his face burning—but from embarrassment or arousal he didn't know. Nodding, he sat warily on the edge of the bed. His heart was threatening to force its way through his mouth. He still kept his gaze away from Remus, focusing instead on the loose threads on the blanket.

"I wanted to ask if you were okay. You've been acting strangely all year, and now…" he trailed off, not sure how to approach the topic delicately. He was never one for tact. "I'm just worried about you, Rem. I wish you'd tell me what's wrong."

"Siri, nothing's wrong. I'm fine. Today I just sort of—lost control. I don't know why I did that." Remus sniffed lightly, adding in a whisper, "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize. I don't have any right to dictate what you do with your l—love life."

"But you _do_. I want you to." Remus said it almost casually, and it took a few seconds for the words to penetrate Sirius's stagnant mind.

"You—what? What does _that_ mean?"

"I mean, you're my—friend. My best friend. That's more important than any fling."

"Oh, right," Sirius said numbly. Remus continued to talk, but Sirius's mind was stuck on what Remus had just said. _Friend. That's all I am…a friend. Who cares if I'm his _best_ friend? I can never be anything more._

Remus abruptly lapsed into silence, shattering his reverie. Sirius turned around to finally face his friend and found that Remus had pressed up against the wall, silent tears running down his face.

Sirius—his body no longer under his control—immediately crossed the length of the bed on his knees and pulled Remus into his arms. A jolt of ecstasy spasmed down his spine the moment their bodies touched. Sirius ignored it—or tried to.

Instead of pulling away, like he had expected, Remus buried his face further in Sirius's shirt and wrapped his arms firmly around his waist, fingers digging into his back. The sobs quickly subsided, but Remus clung on, and Sirius didn't spare a thought on stopping him.

Remus and Sirius had embraced frequently in the past, but this was different. There was something decidedly—almost romantic—about this hug.

Sirius lost track of time, holding Remus in his arms. All too soon, the boy pulled away, face flushed and grinning sheepishly.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"Don't be."

Remus looked at him strangely, almost expectantly.

Sirius cleared his throat. The room was too hot, but he was shivering.

"Uh…Remus. I have to tell you something. I…"—suddenly Sirius's courage failed him, and he abruptly changed direction mid-sentence—"I picked your name out of the hat." He did his best to keep himself from blushing, but his body refused to heed his control. "But you don't have to—you know. I'm sure James and I can find an antidote to the spell we used. Even if we don't, it's only three months." Sirius said all this in the space of four seconds, watching his friend anxiously.

Remus looked surprised—but not repulsed—and when he spoke, his voice was husky and strangely enticing. "You—got my name?"

Sirius nodded, feigning an immense interest in his fingernails. He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Siri?" Remus's face shone with a mixture of worry and apprehension. His speech came out in a breathy whisper. "I don't mind. You can—kiss—me if you want. I understand if you don't want to, but I don't want you to end up with three months of purple pimples."

"You'd do that? For me?"

"Only if you want me to."

Sirius had not realized the boy was moving closer, but suddenly he felt Remus's breath on his face. He hesitated, looking into the boy's amber eyes and trying to decipher the emotions that spun under the surface.

"Remus? Are you sure?"

"Positive," Remus breathed, closing the painful gap between them.

Sirius closed his eyes at the contact. They moved their lips slowly in rhythm. Thoughts vanished; emotions took over. Sirius's heart screamed in rapture as his nostrils filled with Remus's musky scent. Remus's lips felt soft and delicate between his own, and Sirius wound his hands around the boy's waist, desperate for more contact. Remus's fingers found their way into his hair, stroking the scalp sensually. The boy pressed closer, kneeling up so that he was now the one in control.

Remus's tongue was doing amazing things to Sirius's lower lip—and he wondered vaguely where Remus had learned to kiss. Teeth gently nipped at the tender flesh, causing him to moan in pleasure. Callused hands moved down the back of his neck, slipping quietly under the fabric of his shirt. Remus licked urgently at the parting of Sirius's mouth, and Sirius gladly obliged. Remus was inside him instantly, sensuously rubbing his tongue against Sirius's.

He couldn't believe it, but Remus's ministrations actually caused Sirius to whimper in lust. He was hardening fast, and he thoughtlessly pressed his hip against his friend's only to find that there was already something stiff and rather insistent pushing back.

Before he could protest, Sirius was pushed down onto his back, the contact of the kiss never breaking. Remus's hands had moved from Sirius's shoulders to somewhere near his navel, pushing his shirt upwards. Sirius moaned and pulled Remus closer. The throbbing pain in his groin was becoming unbearable. Remus indulged him, thrusting slowly against his aching crotch.

"Mmm…Moony…"

Sirius broke their kiss, letting his head fall back in pleasure. His fingers were digging into the boy's back. His breathing was coming in erratic gasps and pants.

"Ah! Remus, I'm going to—"

Remus let out a sound that was half chuckle, half growl. He moved his lips to Sirius's neck, licking and sucking. His hand found Sirius's nipple, and gently scratched it with the tip of a nail. Sirius lost any control he had right then, thrusting forcefully and eliciting a loud groan from the other boy. Remus squeezed the nipple hard, increasing the friction between their groins.

Sirius was no longer coherent. "Mmm…harder…Moony, please…I…need…harder."

The pain and pleasure of it all was too much for him to handle—yet he wanted more. Sirius's head felt as if he had taken one of the Muggle drugs his cousin had given him once. But this high was not the result of some synthetic chemical. This high was Remus—and Sirius was already addicted.

Remus abruptly pressed his lips to Sirius's in a passionate kiss. The pressure between his thighs was at breaking point, and he arched his back to push even harder against Remus. The boy sucked on Sirius's tongue, setting every one of his nerves on fire.

The rhythm of their rocking sped up. Remus's lips pulled away in a loud cry as he convulsed. Sirius was not far behind. He climaxed a few thrusts later, quivering in ecstasy before falling back onto the bed in exhaustion. Remus rolled off him and lay pressed against his side, panting feverishly.

It was only then that the realization of what they had done dawned on him.

_Oh, shit._

TBC…

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: Several firsts here in this chapter. It's the first time I've used a swear word in a fanfic. And it's my first real smut scene.

SIRIUS: And about time, too.

REMUS: You know, I quite like wearing the trousers.

SIRIUS: Uh, Remus? You're a bloke. You're _supposed_ to wear trousers.

REMUS: No, Sirius. It's a Muggle saying. It means I like being the one in control.

SIRIUS: Oh. You know, you're right. I must admit you're quite kinky in this scene.

JAMES: You guys really like this bondage stuff, don't you?

SIRIUS: James, don't you ever get your head out of the gutter?

DEMONSBLADE: Anyway, you finally got the long-awaited fluff.

SIRIUS: Not exactly bum ravishing, but enough for now, I suppose.

JAMES: When do I get _my_ snog?

SIRIUS: You're not important, James—Ouch!

DEMONSBLADE: Stop that. Of course James is important. Don't worry, James. Your snog's coming up in the next chapter. Don't get too excited, though.

JAMES: Why not?

DEMONSBLADE: Let's just say that Lily's a lot feistier than you give her credit for.

SIRIUS: I guess _she's_ going to wear the trousers in that relationship.

JAMES: Shut up, git.

SIRIUS: Aww, is ickle Jimmy getting mad?

REMUS: Hey, look. I think you got another flame. Apparently this is a "screwed up" story.

DEMONSBLADE: Cool. Thanks!

SIRIUS: You're weird, you know that? Almost as bad as that Lovegood girl.

JAMES: Well, Demon's not quite _that_ bad. At least _she_ doesn't think you're some deranged singer.

SIRIUS: True.

DEMONSBLADE: Thanks for all the reviews, guys. And sorry this is up so late. I hope you liked reading the smut as much as I liked writing it. I feel like I'm pushing the rating here, so tell me if you think I should make this an M story so that I can have a _real_ citrus scene. Adieu!


	5. Apologies

** Secret Snog**

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

James made his way down the stairs, confident in his friends' abilities to sort themselves out. They would either finally admit their feelings for each other—or decide to be friends. _Or they could kill each other in a monumental blood bath and come back as ghosts to haunt me._

He wasn't paying attention to where he was going, his thoughts still in the dormitory with his two best friends.

"James Potter."

James jumped at the voice, whipping around to come face to face with—

"Lily."

"Good afternoon, James," Lily drawled sternly, her wand pointed between his eyes. Her red hair reflected the light in a way that made it look like her head was enveloped in flames. The image conjured up faint memories of playing the Magic card game with his Muggle neighbors—each card had an illustration of a "magical creature" and James's favorite card had been one of a fire goddess.

He quickly shook himself of the thoughts.

"Uh…good afternoon, Lily," he said, wincing when his voice cracked on the name. "Anything I can help you with?"

"So nice of you to ask, James." Lily's bottle green eyes glinted dangerously. She poked his nose with the tip of her wand, squashing it into his face. "Antidote. _Now_."

"What?" James found himself backing up into the wall near the foot of the stairs. His heart pounded an enormous battle cry against his ribcage. Lily advanced on him.

"I want the antidote to whatever potion or spell you used on the Secret Snog parchments."

"But—"

"Don't make me hex you, Potter." Lily jabbed at his nose threateningly.

"But—"

"Because if you don't give me the antidote now, I won't even hesitate to curse your sorry behind all the way to Timbuktu." Despite the frostiness of her voice, James thought he detected an impish delight in her eyes. _So beautiful…_

"What?" Lily asked, startled.

"What?"

"You just said—what's so beautiful?"

_Damn. I can't believe I said it out loud._ James could feel the blood rush to his face, but he kept his voice casually nonchalant. "Nothing at all, Evans."

Lily narrowed her eyes, the edge of coldness back. "So what about that antidote?"

"I don't have one."

"Come again?"

"I don't have an antidote," James repeated, this time in a slow, deliberate voice that he might take with a dimwitted child.

"I don't believe you."

"Really, Lily. There's no antidote."

"Then find one," Lily hissed through her teeth.

"Why?"

"That's really none of your business," she replied coolly.

"Maybe if I knew what the problem was, I could help," he snapped, then forced his voice into a much milder tone. "What's wrong? You don't like who you got?"

"No, I don't bloody like who I got!"

James noted a slight hysteria to Lily's voice that made him soften his attitude considerably. "What's wrong, Lily?" he asked, his voice gentle.

His abrupt change in temperament seemed to take her off guard. She lowered her wand in shock, her jaw slack.

"Lily?"

"I—erm—I got the name of someone I used to—date."

"Oh."

"The relationship ended really badly. It's been two years, but I don't think I can kiss him."

James suddenly felt horrible—for coming up with a game that fooled so much with people's feelings, a game that brought so much emotion to the surface. He thought briefly of the trouble it had caused for his two friends.

"I'm"—James took in a deep breath, forcing the word out of his mouth—"sorry."

"What? What did you say?"

"I'm sorry, okay? I thought it'd be a fun game. I didn't mean for everything to go so wrong." He was surprised at the words spilling from his mouth, but he felt oddly relieved, as if telling Lily had taken some of the guilt away.

"James."

He snapped his head up at the tenderness in Lily's voice. It was the first time she had said his name as if she really meant it.

"Did something else happen, James?"

James nodded dumbly, looking away. He didn't want to betray his friends' trust in him, but he wanted to badly to talk to someone about his mistake.

"Is it about Black and Remus?"

"What?" he sputtered.

Lily looked as if she was refraining from rolling her eyes. "Oh, please. We all saw Remus's jealous French-fest in the Common Room."

"Right," he said shakily.

"James, don't feel bad. It had to happen sooner or later. The tension between them was unbearable at times. Something was bound to trigger it. If it wasn't this game, then it would have been something else. It wasn't your fault."

He nodded again, sighing. Lily patted his shoulder awkwardly; James tried his best to fight to idiotic grin threatening to erupt on his face at the unexpected touch.

"Don't think you're off the hook, though. I still want an antidote."

James suddenly remembered his own Secret Snog, and groaned inwardly at the prospect of approaching Lily—especially after they had almost had a decently normal conversation without him making an utter fool of himself.

"I think I'm going to go to the library for a while."

"Did I hear right?" Lily gasped mockingly. "James Potter, willingly going to the _library_?"

"Ha ha. If you must know, I'm going to research an antidote. It looks like I'm going to need it, too."

"You?" Lily gave him a suspicious frown. "Don't tell me. You cheated your way into getting my name and now you're too ashamed to do it?"

"I didn't cheat!" James seethed indignantly. "I got it fair and square."

"So you _did_ get my name?" Lily smirked as James realized what he had just admitted.

"I guess I did," he said, trying to appear aloof. Why was it so hard to be laid-back when he was around this girl?

"I see." Lily was giving him an odd look, as if trying to peer into his soul. James squirmed uncomfortably under the scrutiny. "Well, come on, then. We better get to the library."

"We?"

Lily smiled at him, a true, genuine smile that made James feel like he was floating thirty feet in the air.

"Yes, we. Two heads are better than one, Potter."

With that, Lily shoved her wand inside her pants pocket and headed in the direction of the portrait hole. James followed along like an obedient child, still trying to comprehend the finer points of their discussion.

x-x-x-x-x

Remus lay on the bed, sweaty and sticky. He could feel the heat from Sirius's body beside him. Not a word had passed between them after they had collapsed, and Remus liked it that way. He could already feel the bile rising at the back of his throat as his mind replayed what had just transpired.

Sirius was attracted. That much he was sure of.

Like the wolf inside him, Remus could sense the most base of emotions—no, not emotions. _Urges._ Joy, sorrow, anger, fear, lust. It was a sort of empathy. The feelings he sensed around him somehow tended to seep into his own heart. That was one of the reasons he never liked being around large groups of people. Too much emotion, too many feelings, too much energy. Once, at a Quidditch World Cup he had attended as a child, his empathy had been so overwhelming that he had passed out.

And he had smelled fear on Sirius just then, a fear so overpowering it clung to his clothes like a rancid stench. But there was something even more potent…lust. He had felt it as soon as Sirius had walked in the room, an explosion of want that clouded every other emotion.

Remus closed his eyes, trying to will himself invisible. He didn't think he could face Sirius after what had happened.

"Remus?" asked a shaky voice.

He kept his eyes closed, repressing the urge to vomit. Maybe if he didn't answer, Sirius would give up and leave.

"Remus?"

_No such luck._

"Moony?"

Remus clenched his teeth, hoping to stop them from shuddering. Unfortunately, the action only made him whimper pitifully at the back of his throat. He blinked back the tears burning his eyes.

Silence, and then—

"Stop ignoring me, dammit!"

Remus steeled himself and turned his head to find Sirius looking at him intently. The pale eyes were unreadable. His ebony hair pooled around him, and his face was still flushed. The musky, erotic scent of sweat and semen hung in the air.

"I'm sorry," Remus whispered hoarsely. "I never meant for things to go this far."

"Don't apologize. I'm as much at fault as you are."

"No. The w—wolf is antsy around this time."

"Because of Lupercalia?" Sirius's eyes were suddenly beset with worry.

"Yes—plus it's m—mating season." Remus blushed, tripping over the last words.

Something like understanding dawned on Sirius's face, shadowed with a trace of—was it disappointment?

"Rem, we really need to talk," said Sirius, sitting up slowly and choosing to conveniently disregard the dark patch of wetness soaked through the front fabric of his pants.

Remus nodded, mimicking the other boy's movements so that they were now seated side by side on Sirius's bed, the blanket and sheets tangled around them. He still refused to make eye contact, choosing instead to trace the folds of the sheets. Sirius's gaze bore into the side of his head, and it was a moment before either of them spoke.

"Moony, I need to know. What happened?" Remus thought he detected a hint of trepidation in that statement, as if Sirius didn't want to hear the answer. Then the voice took on a tone on wry sarcasm. "We seem to be losing control a lot lately."

"It's—" He cut himself off, realizing the pathetic nature of his excuse—the one he had been using to fool everyone, including himself.

"Is it the wolf?"

He chanced a quick glance at his friend. Sirius was biting his lip, and some unidentifiable emotion flitted across his face. Remus clenched his teeth, knowing his world was going to come crashing down the minute he spoke the word.

"No."

"Then it was…you?" Sirius asked slowly.

Remus finally looked up into the boy's eyes, and found himself spellbound. He wanted to look away from the gaze that seemed to drill through his façade and examine his soul closely. He wanted to look away, but found himself simply falling further within those gray depths.

"Yes."

"But—why?" Sirius's eyes held pain, so much pain that it physically hurt Remus to look into them. But the eyes also seemed to be clinging desperately to a deep, albeit small, fraction of hope.

"Because I…I…"—Remus's voice was barely a whisper, and Sirius leant towards him to hear it—"Because I'm in love with you."

TBC (To be continued)…

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: Sorry the update took twice as long. The second part took longer to ferment in my mind than I thought. And I know, I'm terrible to leave off there, but I couldn't help it. I'm evil.

SIRIUS: Damn right, you flint-hearted fool of an author.

JAMES: This story's also been changed to M (R), I've noticed.

DEMONSBLADE: Yes, due to popular demand.

SIRIUS: Popular demand, my behind! You just wanted an outlet for your perverted, dirty thoughts about me and Rem.

DEMONSBLADE: Let's answer some reviews, shall we? **mikomi bansiki** has kindly offered a great solution to my problem.

SIRIUS: What problem?

DEMONSBLADE: You. So unless you learn to behave yourself, I'm afraid I'm going to have to shut you in a room with Dobby and Winky. Wait—on second thought, make that Dobby, Winky, and Kreacher.

SIRIUS: NOOOOOOOOOO!

DEMONSBLADE: Mwhahahahaha!

SIRIUS: You're truly a sadistic, manipulative witch, you know that?

DEMONSBLADE: I know.

REMUS: There've been a lot of comments about my dominance in the smut.

SIRIUS: Because you know, _I'm_ supposed to be the confident, manly dominant figure. You just threw off the entire equation, you stupid author.

DEMONSBLADE: Oh, put a sock in it. I'm not asking _your_ opinion, Sirius. I'm addressing the reviewers. Remus may seem like a shy, submissive type of person, but that's precisely one of the reasons why I think he _would_ take control. Squashing your impulses and desires all the time has to result in some sort of explosion. And as for Remus being too innocent to know much…you'd be surprised what the quiet ones know. But, well, he'll explain that to Sirius soon enough. Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to justify what he did. I'm just explaining why I thought it was something he'd do.

REMUS: **silver-sunn101** writes that Sirius was somewhat OOC in the last chapter.

DEMONSBLADE: I didn't even consider that. I thought he'd naturally be shy around Remus, especially when the two are alone…but I see what you mean when you say he loses his consistency. Oops. Guess I overdid that one. And I also realize that you're right in saying I don't have much description of the setting. I'll try to add more in the future. And you're probably right on that they wouldn't have quite gone that far. I wasn't even intending for them to. It just sort of…happened. The characters took over, and—

SIRIUS: We did no such thing! It was all you—you and your sick, dirty little mind.

DEMONSBLADE: Okay, so it was me. But even though Remus said the wolf had no control over him, the wolf's instincts, unfortunately, did. But that's coming up in the next chapter, so I'm not going to give anything away.

JAMES: I've got to ask…why didn't I get my snog?

DEMONSBLADE: I told you not to get your hopes up. But don't worry, you aren't quite done yet.

JAMES: So—I have a chance?

DEMONSBLADE: Depends. If you restrain this troublemaking idiot for me—and I mean you, Sirius—then I'll consider it.

SIRIUS: Too bad for you, then. Because James would never betray me. Right, James? James?—What are the ropes for? Hey! Moony, help!

REMUS: Er…

SIRIUS: James, you traitor! I hope your dick shrivels up and falls off!

DEMONSBLADE: Sirius! Don't blatantly steal insults from Gravitation. It's plagiarism.

SIRIUS: As if _you'd_ know anything about plagiarism.

DEMONSBLADE: I don't plagiarize! I…borrow.

SIRIUS: Right.

DEMONSBLADE: Heh…anyway, I hope you liked this installment. Sorry it took so long. And keep those reviews coming. Later.


	6. Making Up and Making Out

** Secret Snog**

* * *

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

"I don't see it anywhere!" James slammed the heavy leather-bound volume closed and proceeded to glare at it.

The library was quite deserted at this time—well, deserted except for the couples that he and Lily kept finding in hidden away the corners doing all sorts of unmentionable things. James and Lily sat at a table near the window, mounds of books piled around them.

Lily sighed and shot him an impatient look over her book. "Well, it's really your fault for putting such a difficult hex on the parchments."

"I wasn't planning on not getting my snog," he said huffily. James regretted the comment as soon as it left his mouth.

Lily rounded on him. "So you're saying you would've snogged any airhead you got, and then gone right back to trying to woo me?"

"Uh…" He blushed, and muttered, "I was hoping to get your name."

"And then what? You thought I'd just let you cram your tongue down my throat just because you happened to get my name?"

"I'm sorry, okay?" he snapped.

"Okay," she said, her voice once again gentle. "I shouldn't have yelled. It's not your fault. Well, okay—it _is_ your fault. But I forgive you." She gave him a tentative smile and went back to perusing the book in front of her.

James took a deep breath and pulled a new book from the pile. They worked in silence for what seemed like hours before Lily let out an exclamation of delight.

"I found it!" She beamed at him and scooted closer so that they could both look at the book she pushed under his nose. "It's not really a counter-curse, but it'll cancel out the effects of the hex just the same."

He let out the breath he had been holding and offered her a grin. "You amaze me, Lily," he said honestly.

James was surprised to see a faint blush color the girl's cheeks and her smile widen at the compliment.

Later they left the library side-by-side, talking. James couldn't believe his luck. He had managed to spend an entire afternoon with Lily without making a fool of himself or getting hexed into next week.

They clambered through the portrait hole to find most of the common room empty. Everyone seemed to be off trying to corner the objects of their affections. James hoped his two friends had managed to sort everything out. He even had an antidote now for Sirius should the boy fail to make any headway with Remus.

"James."

He spun around at the almost nervous quality of Lily's voice.

"Thanks for helping me, James." She looked up into his eyes, a sincere smile gracing her mouth. "You really aren't so bad. So if you want, well"—she offered him her hand, which he timidly took—"let's be friends."

Suddenly she pushed up with her tiptoes and pressed a small kiss to his lips. James watched, dumbfounded, as she pulled back and ran up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. Slowly a smile creeped onto his face.

He had gotten his kiss after all.

x-x-x-x-x

"Because I'm in love with you."

Sirius swallowed audibly, and when he spoke, his voice shook.

"W—what? What did you just say?"

There was a brief flash of emotion in Remus's amber eyes, but it was gone before Sirius could identify it, leaving Remus looking older than any sixteen-year-old had any right to look.

"I love you, Sirius."

Sirius's heart swelled with joy until he thought it was trying to force itself out his mouth. He suddenly, inexplicably, felt like crying. All he wanted was to gather the other boy in his arms, but his body seemed to be frozen to the spot, blithely ignoring his orders. Finally, as the horrible silence stretched out before them, Sirius croaked out a response.

"Remus, I—I never…I was so…oh, fuck it! I love you, too."

The boy's head snapped up, his eyes wide with disbelief. "You—do?"

"I _do_," said Sirius, keeping his voice gentle and patient. "I don't really know how long I've felt this way, but I only realized it halfway through fourth year."

Remus narrowed his eyes, visibly stiffening. "Are you sure? Are you sure it isn't just…lust?"

"Lust?" Sirius asked blankly. "What do you mean?"

Remus looked at him pleadingly, his expression one of such distress that Sirius found his lungs constricting of their own accord.

"I could sense it, Sirius. I could _smell_ lust."

"_What_?"

"It's mating season. The wolf is acutely in tune with certain…ah…urges at this time…and, by extension, so am I. I could smell lust on you the second you walked in."

"What else did you smell?" he asked gently.

Remus seemed startled by the question, as if it was the last thing he expected. "Well, I could smell fear…but the lust was blocking nearly everything else out."

"I suppose there's no denying that I felt that way, but what you didn't smell was the _love_ overshadowing it all."

"L—love?"

Sirius reached a trembling hand toward Remus's cheek, and felt him stiffen—then gradually relax—at the contact.

"I love you, Remus."

"Are—are you _sure_? It's not because I'm convenient? I mean—I'm gay, I'm a friend, and I'm right here. Are you sure it's not because of that? Because I wouldn't say no?"

"Rem," Sirius said forcefully, leaning toward the boy so that they were mere inches apart. "I loved you before I even knew you were gay. I'd love you even if you weren't. Hell, I'd love you even if you were some fifty-year-old hag that smelled like a dumpster…well, okay—that's a bit much. The point is, I'd love you no matter what. You're my Moony."

The smile that Remus gave him melted his knees. There were tears spilling from those golden eyes, and Sirius wiped them away with his thumb. He bent forward and pressed a soft, chaste kiss onto Remus's lips.

Remus gasped, stunned, then responded timidly—not at all like the feral, passionate lover he'd been a few minutes ago.

This was the Remus he knew—not the untamed, hungry wolf, but the quiet, shy, nervous Remus Lupin.

Sirius had never been as happy in all his life as he was at that moment. This was definitely heaven.

He would have to thank James later. Right now, his entire world was contained in the supple lips of the boy he loved.

The End (?)

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: I'm soooooo sorry, everyone! Sorry it took so long.

SIRIUS: Hey! Where's the bum ravishing?

DEMONSBLADE: Uh…

SIRIUS: You made this an R story. So let's see the smut, woman!

DEMONSBLADE: Okay, okay. I've decided to write a smutty epilogue to make up for the sexually anti-climactic end.

SIRIUS: Yay! You know, you might not be such a brainless twit after all…

DEMONSBLADE: Aww, thanks!

SIRIUS: The reviewers demand sex! (mutters) Perverts…fantasizing about me and Rem…

REMUS: Sirius!

SIRIUS: What? They are! Why do you think they read this story?

REMUS: Maybe for the sweet fluff and friendly banter.

SIRIUS: Yeah, right.

REMUS: They like dominant me, though. Hehe…you got called a "shabby mutt."

SIRIUS: _Shabby mutt!_ Why I oughta…

REMUS: Don't feel bad, Padfoot. I love you anyway.

DEMONSBLADE: Thanks for all the reviews, everyone. Oh, and a note to the anonymous flamer who claims to hate this story but keeps coming back to read it anyway: No, I have no plot. But did I ever claim to? This is just a fluff/smut fic written to keep myself and other SB/RL slashers happy. Sorry you don't like it. I just find it funny that you keep reading it even though you flame it. And as for the really really long flame that "frog" left me, I just say that someone had WAY too much time and a little too much fun with a thesaurus. It takes a lot to get under my skin. By all means, you can keep trying. But I feel I should give you a fair warning that my head's too swollen to allow me to feel offended by anything you might have to say.

SIRIUS: Swollen is right. And you say _I'm_ arrogant.

DEMONSBLADE: Shut it, Sirius. Anyway, see you all in the epilogue! Ta!


	7. The Smutty Epilogue

**Secret Snog**

Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.

* * *

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Sirius asked for what felt to Remus like the hundredth time that day. All through classes he had been anxiously whispering the question at Remus. 

"Yes!" Remus finally snapped back loudly. Unfortunately, they were in the middle of the hallway on their way back to Gryffindor tower for the only free period they had together. Students turned around to stare at Remus's exclamation. He felt his face flush. "I do if you do, Sirius," he said softly.

People walked on, giving Remus funny looks. Sirius smirked smugly at them as they passed. Then, abruptly, he took hold of Remus's wrist and pulled him at a light jog toward the tower, weaving in and out of the crowds. He didn't stop until they were inside the dormitory, door locked and charmed, curtains drawn.

Remus dropped his book bag at the foot of his bed and turned to face Sirius. In the darkness from the closed curtains, he could see Sirius's blurred outline, his skin darker and more enticing in the shade.

A pair of strong arms encircled his waist, and Remus was pulled over to his own bed. He dropped gratefully into Sirius's welcoming warmth, foreheads pressed together.

"Ready, Pads?" he whispered.

He felt Sirius nod against him and pull him so that he was lying on top of him.

"I'm ready if you are." Sirius suddenly looked anxious. "I don't want to hurt you, Rem."

"You won't." Remus pressed his face into Sirius's neck and licked the pulse point there.

Sirius drew in a sharp breath. In one fluid movement, he had flipped them so that he was now the one straddling Remus. Their lips found one another, and Remus was hard put to keep from moaning at the sensations Sirius's touch was causing in his body. Every place their skin made contact felt like it was on fire. But they didn't have much time—

"Padfoot," Remus panted, pulling away from the kiss just enough to talk. "We only have an hour before Transfiguration."

"Then we should get to work, shouldn't we?" Sirius asked wickedly.

He kissed Remus again—more urgently this time. Any other time, Remus would have been disgusted at the amount of saliva the kiss produced, but he was too busy basking in its perfection to notice. Sirius's tongue found its way into Remus and curled around his own, bending in ways he was sure tongues weren't supposed to bend.

Sirius trailed kisses down his jaw, stopping at his neck to nibble a mark of ownership. Again, Remus would have normally found this appalling, but he was surprised to discover that he didn't mind belonging to Sirius—it was actually quite an arousing thought.

Something hard touched his chest lightly; he felt a tingling feeling, and suddenly his clothes were gone. Sirius raised his head from where he was licking Remus's collarbone and smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry…we don't have much time. Next time, I'll take hours doing this part."

Remus groped around for his own wand. After a few seconds of fumbling, his fingers closed around the hard wood. He flicked it once, and Sirius's clothes vanished, leaving him completely and gloriously naked.

He gasped as Sirius's mouth closed on his nipple, teeth grazing the sensitive skin. Remus moaned and wound his hands in the ebony hair that he had always loved touching. Sirius licked down to his navel while his hands drew soft circles on Remus's thighs.

Remus wasn't expecting Sirius to go any lower, so he couldn't help but groan surprisedly as a hot, wet mouth found his erection. A tongue swirled around the head. Remus struggled to stiffle his cry of pleasure as his body shuddered and thrust. His hands spasmed on the bedclothes, trying to get a firm grip on anything except Sirius's hair.

He was peaking fast. Thrusting hard and fast into his lover's mouth, Remus cried Sirius's name as his body trembled with his climax.

Panting hard, Remus vaguely heard Sirius sputter and cough, something being spit out. And then Sirius's head swimmed above him, smirking and looking slightly guilty.

"I wasn't expecting that," said Sirius.

"Did it taste that bad?"

As an answer, Sirius descended on his mouth, prying his lips apart with his tongue. Remus tasted the salty, metallic tang on Sirius's tongue as they kissed.

"Ready for the next step?" Sirius asked as they broke apart.

Remus nodded, preparing himself for the pain that he knew would come. Sirius retreated so that he was sitting on the bed and gently pried apart Remus's legs. Wand firmly gripped in one hand, he looked to Remus for confirmation before whispering the charm.

Suddenly Remus smothered a howl of pain as a sharp, slick, hot sting shot up his back.

"Relax, Rem," Sirius said, kissing him softly.

Remus blinked the tears away, biting his lip to keep from crying out. Sirius was staring at him fearfully. He smiled, forcing his muscles to relax. The pain slowly ebbed away, leaving a trace of tingling pleasure. He nodded, smiling what he hoped was an encouraging smile.

Sirius looked deeply into his eyes for a minute, then smiled and kissed him. Remus pulled him closer by the neck.

The sudden tensing in Sirius's muscles was the only warning he got. Sirius pushed gently inside him, and Remus was in pain again. He breathed deeply, again manually loosening his muscles. They kissed—and waited for the pain to recede. At Remus's nod, Sirius started moving inside him, never breaking the kiss.

Their rocking sped, until Sirius inadvertently hit a spot that made white spots appear in Remus's eyes and a thrill of pleasure undulate through his body. Sirius broke away and gave him an inquisitive look.

"Do that again," Remus managed to say.

Sirius smiled and again pressed their lips together. Again and again he angled himself so that he would hit that one spot that made his lover moan into his mouth. Remus shivered underneath him. The warmth, the pressure—it was almost too much to bear.

Remus forced his eyes open—even through the distraction of orgasm—to look at Sirius as he came. Sirius's eyes held such love and desire that at that moment, Remus felt like the luckiest person in the world. He felt Sirius come inside him, the hot liquid filling him out.

They shuddered and lay limp in each other's arms, too content to move. Eventually, Sirius mustered up enough energy to withdraw himself from Remus and roll off him. Remus muttered a cleaning spell.

Sirius wrapped his body around Remus so that, if anyone had walked in, all they would have seen is a tangle of limbs.

"That was fun," Sirius whispered into his ear.

Remus turned his head and pressed their lips together.

"Yes, Padfoot. That was indeed, as you say, fun."

The End.

* * *

DEMONSBLADE: I know…it took a while. But I finally wrote it, right? 

SIRIUS: A while? Do you have any idea how long I've waited for this, woman?

DEMONSBLADE: (ignores) I'm sure we all need smutty pick-me-ups after HBP.

SIRIUS: (bursts out in tears) M—my Remmy's w—with that horrible little—

DEMONSBLADE: Now, now, Sirius. She's not that bad. She's just trying to—

SIRIUS: Not that bad? She's evil, I tell you!

REMUS: Sirius, relax. She's not evil. She's your cousin's daughter.

SIRIUS: (cries harder) Did you hear that? He's sticking up for her! Nobody loves me!

REMUS: Don't be so dramatic, Sirius.

SIRIUS: Remus hates me!

REMUS: Don't be silly…I just…I mean…why did you have to die, anyway?

SIRIUS: Er…

REMUS: Exactly.

SIRIUS: (sniff) It still doesn't mean you need to screw her to get over me.

REMUS: I didn't "screw" her. All I did was hold her hand!

SIRIUS: Yeah, well…

REMUS: Don't sulk, Sirius. Here…what do you say to some hot, sweaty sex to get your mind off things?

SIRIUS: Really? With handcuffs and a riding crop and leather and a whip and—

REMUS: Um…maybe just the handcuffs…and maybe a dog collar. What do you say, Padfoot?

SIRIUS: Hmm…how 'bout I transform?

REMUS: Sirius, I don' care how kinky you think it is. Animagus or not, I'm _not_ having sex with a dog.

SIRIUS: Fine.

REMUS: Fine.

SIRIUS: I'll get the handcuffs.

REMUS: I'll get the dog collar.

DEMONSBLADE: I'll get the popcorn. ;)

SIRIUS: You sick, sick woman—get the hell away from Remus!

DEMONSBLADE: Okay, okay. Keep your shirt on…actually, nevermind that. Well, this was certainly fun. Hope you all liked the story. And thanks for sticking with me this long.


End file.
